I grabbed onto your leather coat

"Please don't do this."

he looked away realizing the pain.

I clenched on with both hands.

The tear that was welling, fell.

"Please don't leave me."

He looked at me.

He saw the sorrow.

A tear fell.

His.

Then mine.

He looked away again.

Placed his bag in the back of his truck.

Beat up and dirty.

He shook me off.

"Please don't. Not now."

He looked at the car door.

Then at me.

My tear fell.

His were dry.

"Babe, no please."
He places his hand on the door handel.

He hesitated.

I sniffled.

Open.

Sit.

Shut.

Glance.

Key.

Turn.

Gas.

Falling to my knees.

I sobbed.

"Please!"

I screamed.

I watched him go.

No hesitation.

It was gone.

And even when he was gone, the dust had settled, and my tears were gone, I was still kneeling there and hoping that I would see the glow of his brake. Hear the tires coming closer. See his head lights in the distance. Feel his hands around my body. But he was gone; and even as I knew he wasn't going to turn back around, I would have been content with a flash of his break, or maybe even a slow down. But - he was gone.

And even hours later I was still kneeling in the on the gravel. I was still waiting. Hoping that somehow, somewhere, he would be regretting.

I've stood in the rain.

Once or twice.

I look outside the window.

Rain.

The rain fell.

Harder than before.

I crawled under my blanket.

hot chocolate.

Warmth.

Perfect.

...

Lonely.